Confidence is something we build, not what we are born with. When you think about it, as infants, we all had to depend on a caregiver for nurturing and growth. As we mature, we learn how to feed ourselves, put on our own clothes, and communicate with those around us. We go through school and maybe get a college degree. Then we show up in the workplace without an ounce of experience.
Somehow, in the business world, our confidence either decreased gradually as we make mistakes or grows as we accomplish tasks and excel. Often, the difference in our confidence level comes down to how we react to criticism, our ability to gain knowledge and experience, and the decisions we make throughout the day. It's possible to grow in confidence at work but you need to work on it.
Everyone knows that competence is essential to workplace success, professional achievement and personal satisfaction. But without confidence, competence will only take you so far. And unfortunately, too many perfectly capable leaders lack confidence.
Building confidence does not require a complete personality overhaul. Instead, you can take smaller steps to become more self-assured and boost your confidence. Here are 9 steps to start with:
1. Ask for what you want.
For more timid people, the thought can be terrifying. You may feel it is presumptuous or rude. But it is important especially for women. Men, in general, are not as hesitant to ask for a raise or a title change, and they reap the benefits. Most times, if you ask for something you deserve, you will get it. So, if you have been working your butt of at a company for two years without a raise, bite the bullet and ask for one. The worst they can say is no. But what if they say yes?
2. Accept failure and value criticism.
For people who lack confidence, recognising weakness is really easy. But rather than mentally blaming yourself when you mess up or not do a perfect job, remember that it happens to literally everyone. The difference is that confident people do not have time to wallow in failure. They are busy fixing the problem and learning from it. So next time your boss provides negative feedback on a project, do not be embarrassed. Admit your mistake, own it and move forward. Also keep in mind that when someone takes time to provide constructive criticism, it means they are invested in you. It means they have faith that you can do it right the next time. The more you accept failure and the less you take it personally, the stronger you will be in the long-run.
3. Train yourself
Personal training helps in building confidence because it goes right to the source of the problem. You might feel ill-equipped at work and hesitant because you do not have the proper training. Fortunately, that is easy to correct. Find online courses in your field or go to a seminar and start growing in your capabilities to counteract any feelings of inadequacy.
4. Develop your knowledge
It might seem obvious, but you can also build confidence by learning more. Read more books, watch more TED talks, and attend more seminars. It is easy to go overboard, and spouting your knowledge too often can be a confidence killer when people who have greater knowledge on the subject start debating with you, but knowing what to do about a complex issue or problem can help you gain confidence. Confidence grows when you act on what you know.
5. Keep a smile on your face
People with confidence tend to smile more, but it is a learned skill. If you walk around the office and greet others, smile first and ask about their day. The change in attitude about what is going on around the office builds your own confidence because you realise you need to have a better outlook and that is highly necessary. Confidence is reflected.
6. Walk with pep
This works! How you move around in the office can determine your mood. If you shuffle down the hall to your next meeting, it creates a negative reaction among the others. Add a little punch and energy, and you can gain more confidence when people notice you have the pep. It is also self-perpetuating. The more bounce you have in your step, the more energy you generate physically and the more you will feel like getting to that meeting a little faster next time.
7. Ask questions
Never be afraid to ask questions when you do not know something. Doing a task incorrectly because you do not fully understand it, is not a good way to boost confidence. If you are ever unsure of how something should be done, ask someone else what you need to do. Additionally, do not go about a project without fully understanding the brief. Better than messing it up and lowering your confidence, ask for clarification of what precisely is required.
8. Eliminate your negative language
Sometimes the very language we use limits us. If you are walking around all day saying, “I can’t” you will find that you are closing your mind to solutions. Instead ask yourself, “How could I do it?” Finding effective solutions that will boost confidence greatly. Many people place unnecessary limitations on themselves at work, by using the word “but” in their communication. Stop saying “but” for a while and notice how you can get more done if you make an effort, rather than making excuses. Always have a positive and “can do” attitude. That is the only way you can drive to get things done.
9. Find people who will boost your confidence
Stopping hanging out with friends who are always negative. Find people with a “Can do” attitude. Staying around people who start every sentence with “can’t do” just discourage you. Find people who know how to encourage you and build you up. This applies to relationships with the significant other too- find a partner who will help you grow and build up. If you tend to hang out with people who criticise you too much, that is going to kill your confidence. It might be time to find new friends.
You know you need to fake it ‘til you make it. We are all more competent than we know. So act like you know it all! Adopting that mindset will help you take more risks and overcome any fear of failure.
Once you’ve taken steps to build your own confidence, make sure you give someone else a hand up. Through peer coaching, you can partner with others to create a positive change.
References
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/249428
http://www.inc.com/john-brandon/10-ways-to-build-your-confidence-at-work.html
http://theeverygirl.com/5-ways-to-develop-confidence-in-the-workplace
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/10-tips-for-boosting-your-confidence-work.html
