It has been discovered that bullying is not only limited to teenagers. In fact more and more people are reporting bullies at workplaces. According to a 2010 survey conducted by the Workplace Bullying Institute, 35% of the American workforce (or 53.5 million people) has directly experienced bullying--or “repeated mistreatment by one or more employees that takes the form of verbal abuse, threats, intimidation, humiliation or sabotage of work performance"--while an additional 15% said they have witnessed bullying at work. Approximately 72% of those bullies are bosses. Which means, bullying at workplace can occur between boss and an employee or among co-workers but it is most difficult to deal with a bullying situation by a boss since the boss is responsible for your advancement within the organisation.

Sometimes employees do not realise when their boss is bullying. They believe that they have a tough boss or a very pushy boss to get results. Bullying at workplace can have a significant consequences and may impact your overall wellbeing. Therefore, it is necessary to distinguish between a tough boss and a bullying boss. According to Gary Namie, PhD, director of the Workplace Bullying Institute, these are the 25 most common tactics adopted by bullies, according to targeted victims:

1. Assigning undesirable work for employees as punishment.
2. Taking credit for work done by others.
3. Sabotaging the employee’s contribution to a team goal and reward.
4. Disregarding satisfactory or exemplary quality of completed work despite evidence.
5. Making verbal put-downs/insults based on gender, race, accent or language, and even disability.
6. Intruding privacy and using confidential information about an employee to humiliate privately or publicly.
7. Encouraging the employee to quit or transfer rather than to face more mistreatment.
8. Staring, glaring, being nonverbally intimidating and clearly showing hostility.
9. Discounting an employee’s thoughts feelings.
10. Exhibiting presumably uncontrollable mood swings in front of the group.
11. By falsely accusing someone of “errors” not actually made by the employee.
12. Ensuring failure of person’s project by not performing required tasks: signoffs, taking calls, working with collaborators.
13. Harshly and constantly criticising having a different ‘standard’ for the target.
14. Starting, or failing to stop, destructive rumors or gossip about the employee.
15. Encouraging other employees to turn against the person being tormented.
16. Singling out and isolating one person from co-workers, either socially or physically.
17. Publicly displaying “gross,” undignified, but not illegal, behavior.
18. Using the “silent treatment” to “ice out” and separate from others.
19. Unreasonable yelling, screaming, and throwing tantrums in front of others to humiliate a person.
20. Abusing the employee evaluation process by lying about the person’s performance.
21. Rebelling for failing to follow impractical/arbitrary commands.
22. Making up own rules that even she/he does not follow.
23. Retaliating against the employee after a complaint was filed.
24. Making undoable demands- increasing workload, impractical deadlines, duties — for person singled out.
25. Launching a baseless campaign to overthrow the employee.

If you are constantly experiencing any of these abuses, it is important to recognise that this is workplace bullying and it is not a normal part of any workplace environment. Remember, bullying does not mean there is something wrong with you. Repetitive verbal abuse, exploitation, micromanagement and other activities that repeatedly demean you will eventually take a toll on you. Find some outside support for what you are experiencing and look for options for your situation even though it is reporting your boss, filing a complaint, looking for a new job or getting outside counseling. With some effort, you can escape a bullying boss.

Few smart ways to deal with bullying bosses are

1. Keep everything document.

May it be every conversation, every slight, every email- Keep them all. It is that your accusations need proof, and these documentations will come in handy if you ever need to go to HR or be the victim of wrongful firing. Save all the emails and memos, especially those where you believe your boss is being particularly unfair or unprofessional. If your boss bullies you verbally, send him/her an email outlining the conversation. For example: “In our discussion this afternoon, you said I was being a crybaby. I would like to stop the behavior you find offensive, so if you could tell me specifically how you would like me to improve, I would greatly appreciate it.” If you feel this is too confrontational, then simply send an email to yourself for your own records.

2. Confront them

If you have recognised that you are being bullied, it is necessary to confront them because researches say that workplace bullying hurts more than sexual harassment since it causes anxiety, job stress and less job commitment. As though it is not enough and even decision making ability goes for a toss as well as your sense of self-worth. Even though you are doing a great job, you start doubting yourself. So, if you love your job, it is best to confront them in private and not plot to expose them publically.

3. Prove you are that you are dedicated

You must emphasise on your competencies. You critically self-evaluate your performance and if you genuinely see you are under-performing, ask for feedback. Very firmly state that you do not appreciate them name-calling you before your peers. While you are talking to them do not break the eye contact. Make sure you speak like you mean it and want them to take you seriously. Do not at any cost display a low self-esteem. Stay calm and optimistic even though they try to intimidate you.

4. Remain calm.

Maintain a sense of control over your emotions and speak objectively, you will be more persuasive and can help keep the conversation from becoming overheated.

Do not be snappish, just state the issues in your own words and offer ways you both can work together. Stick to the facts always and make sure you maintain your professionalism. You can say something like, “I do not appreciate you calling me names, and I hope we can have more productive, professional interactions in the future.”

Cite specific examples: “It is not appropriate for you to yell at me in front of the entire marketing team.” If you stand up for yourself, the bullying may back down.

5. Reach out to the HR department.

If your boss does not change behavior after you talk with them, reach out to your HR representative. Make sure you walk up there with evidence so gather your documentation, emails, etc., and ask for a meeting in person. Make sure during every move you maintain a calm demeanor while presenting your case.

If the other members of your department were also bullied, try to get them to accompany you for the HR meeting and at the end of the conversation, find out what the next steps are. Keep a summary of the meeting and send a copy to the HR representative.

6. Hiring an attorney to represent you.

If it is really bad, like bullying is race based or involves sexual harassment, your boss may be violating state or federal laws. Remember, however, that bullying in itself is not against the law but can be work place law.

Most workplace experts suggest only hiring an attorney if you feel you have a strong case that the bullying is race or gender based.

Whatever bullying it is, always make sure you are professional. Take the high road and follow proper procedures. No matter how difficult your boss is just do not get into a shouting match or let your emotions get out of hand. Remember it is not likely for your boss to change overnight, so be prepared but the key is not to get away with continuing his/her bad bullying.

Reference:

https://www.verywell.com/signs-your-boss-is-a-bully-460785

http://www.wikihow.com/Handle-a-Bullying-Boss

http://www.forbes.com/sites/jacquelynsmith/2013/09/20/how-to-deal-with-a-bullying-boss/#6ee43a914c4a

http://www.payscale.com/career-news/2015/01/when-the-boss-is-a-bully

https://www.themuse.com/advice/smart-ways-to-deal-when-your-boss-is-a-bully

https://www.peoplematters.in/article/life-at-work/dealing-with-a-boss-who-is-a-bully-14798

http://www.payscale.com/career-news/2015/01/when-the-boss-is-a-bully